Wednesday, 16 March 2016

Hell's Bells!

It's been a while. Many irons in the fire at the moment, lots of balls in the air. Firstly, I am working on a project with Thaumiel Nerub from D-oom Products, called ‘The Skeleton Coast’. It’s a sandbox/point crawl type thingy, that promises to be a tough excursion with some exciting locations to adventure in. Thaumiel is doing some amazing art behind this, and needless to say, I am excited to see what we come up with.

Secondly, I am working on another project with the Master of the d100 table, Konsumterra, of elfmaidsandoctopi. Take a hop over to his blog for the first two exciting pieces of what he has come up with for this . In short, a huge opening next to a village leads down to Hell. Again, it will be a sand/point/crawl adventure, guaranteed to never be the same twice.

The village is called Black Stump, and because of its proximity to such evil, livestock are mutated, as well as the villagers themselves. Below is a small slice of what to expect; it's written primarily around the animals, but you can skip the first small chart and just roll, making the appropriate changes where necessary.  

Not all is well in Black Stump, nor should it be, being this close to the Maw of Hell is bound to have certain, consequences…

Misshapen Livestock/Villagers

 1.   Cows 
 2. Chickens 
 3. Sheep 
 4. Goats 
 5. Horses 
 6. Rabbits

If your result on the Abnormalities chart is not applicable, as in, you can’t milk a chicken, then simply roll again. These results can be singular, or apply to the entire herd.


1.      Have slimy pink tentacles, instead of eyes.
2.       No legs, has flippers/fins instead.
3.       A large slavering mouth on the beast’s stomach. It recites demonic litanies with as much bile and blasphemy as it can muster. It peppers its devilish ramblings with eye-watering swearing, and personal attacks on the Players. Think, ’The Exorcist’.
4.       Head has been replaced by that of another animal.
5.       Have reptilian skin instead of what it should normally have. The skin is cracked and weeping, and emits a truly smelly substance.
6.       Have tiny baby fingers instead of teeth.
7.       Tail is actually an arm.
8.       When milked the animal gives off : 1) Scalding hot water, 2) Pus, 3) Urine, 4) Custard, 5) Steam, 6) A random potion, 7) Poison, 8) Blood, 9) A green glowing liquid, 10) A yellowish gas.
9.       Have eyes dotted all over body.
10.   Animal has no ears and the sockets are writhing with maggots
11.   When walking the hooves/feet give off large blue sparks.
12.   The head is alight with a strange black fire.
13.   Creature has large bat wings that are too weak to actually be of any use.
14.   Has a singular horn coming from its forehead and farts fire.
15.   The animal has large gills on the side of its neck.
16.   Has the head of a giant fly.
17.   The animals don’t bleat or neigh etc. Instead they, 1) Cry like baby. 2) Hiss. 3) Buzz like many flies. 4) Certain random words in Common, but backwards. 5) Caw. 6) Screech. 7) Scream. 8) Pray.
18.   They have developed a taste for human flesh.
19.   Dorsal fin on back.
20.   Are covered in human hair (if animal) or covered in molding feathers if not. 
21.   Tongue is made of a green, pulpy, plant-like substance, and is coated in wicked thorns.
22.   Have multiple heads.
23.   Have developed a taste for each other.
24.   A mouthful of shark’s teeth.
25.   Have the head of a large bird, except for the chickens, they have the head of a cat.
26.   Have retractable claws.
27.   Have luminous yellow eyes that glow-in-the-dark.
28.   Have detachable jaws like a snake, and can swallow things twice their size.
29.   Are completely see-through.
30.   Covered in tiny steaming cuts that bleed profusely. 

Imps and such are fond of practical jokes and love to hide gruesome items in your food. Makes the whole,’ Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup…’ pale in comparison.

Things you really don’t want to find in your meal.

Waiter! There’s a (roll d20) in my Ale/ Gruel/ Meat-Pie/ Loaf of Bread/Soup/Stew

1. Toe-nail clippings
2. A glass eye
3. A real eye
4. The tip of a penis
5. Maggots
6. A small pink sack that is writhing, with something trying to get out. If you wait around long enough, it births a large purple fly.
7. A forked-tongue.
8. A piece of skin with a large boil on it.
9. An Imp’s tail
10. A small mouse
11. Half a small mouse!
12. An egg. Has a slimy frog inside.
13. A nose
14. Tiny fruit bat ( still alive)
15. Rabbit/Sheep droppings
16. Tentacles
17. Bloodstained bandage
18. A clump of matted hair, with a piece of scalp attached
19. Rot grubs
20. Green slime